If you’ve been on any social media platforms this weekend and the beginning of this week then you have seen “me too” on one platform or another.
How sad is this: I saw at least 12 consecutive posts all saying “me too.” 12, count them!
How did this happen? How did we get here? When did people start to rationalize looking at a man or woman and thinking to themselves “oh hey, she’s an attractive woman, let me scream obscenities out my car window as she walks down the street?” When did it become a part of the culture to grab a women’s ass without permission? When did forcing sex or sexual acts on a girlfriend seem like a good idea when she said “no, I’m not in the mood tonight, I’m too tired from working all day?”
There’s an old saying “let boys be boys,” now most people have seen that saying on a kids t-shirt or a poster and it’s crossed out and it now reads “let boys be good humans”.
Any unwanted advances are a problem. If you see a person on the street and you think you’d like to say something, take a step back and think how you’d feel if the roles were reversed, would you want someone hanging out the window talking about the size of your dick? Which brings me to my second point, anytime a woman rejects a male’s advances, she’s called “bitch” or “ugly” or another insult.
So, as a woman I must appreciate your crude comments and not respond and defend myself because if I do then I’m “crazy”. It’s a double standard.
Here’s what I am going to do to put an end to this – ok to try to put an end to this. I’m going to raise my son to be a kind, gentle man, to respect women and men. Not to ever make someone uncomfortable or uneasy and to never make an insensitive comment. Not because I’m his mother or because he has an older sister but because everyone deserves to be respected and treated well – I’m going to tell him how great sex is and how enjoyable it is, but if at any moment his partner says “no, stop” for whatever reason that’s ok. There’s no need to be hurt or upset because if he was the one saying “NO” I’d hope his partner would be respectful of him and his wishes. I’ll remind him not to go along with his friends if they are participating in this behavior, and that it’s never ok and there is never an excuse for it. And I won’t ever tolerate it.
I’m going to tell my daughter it’s ok to want sex and to wear short skirts and no matter what she is wearing she would never be asking for it, but she needs to be aware of her surroundings, use the buddy system, call me if she has to walk to her car alone so she will be able to yell if something happens or she sees something happening to someone else. I will teach her how to throw a punch and defend herself if she ever needs to. I’ll tell her how sometimes it’s not the bad boys who are the worst offenders but it can be her friends. I will tell her she’s strong and beautiful and to never be ashamed or scared – she’s never alone. I will tell her to be supportive of her friends if they say they’ve been victimized.
Lets all agree to raise our kids to be good humans and do the best they can and to never judge and always offer a listening ear.